Because I believe in humoring my friends
but not before I make fun of them for participating in silly online weenie games. (But secretly I'm flattered that they thought of me at all).
1)In the third grade, walking home from school one day, my neighbor who was 7 years my senior grabbed and empty, insignificant coin holder from me in jest. I chased him for 30 feet, promptly gave up, and buried my face in the grass. I discovered the next day that the grass was in fact poison ivy as my left eye had swollen shut.
2) I have a mole on my lower right eye lid, but it's not a real mole. It's a sulfuric acid burn from a reaction that should have cost me that eye. I figure maybe there's a God afterall.
3) I have never dated a blonde girl.
4) I had never heard of pornography until the 7th grade when a kid brought a tape to class, put it in the VCR, and hit play.
5) I remember inconsequential details about people months and even years after they tell me.
HOW did you know about that!? translation: Are you stalking me?
Um, you told me.
Oh. I did? translation: That can't be right, I'd never tell someone like you anything about myself?
Yeah, you told me three Wednesday's ago while reading a fashion magazine. translation: Back off my grill crazy lady.
6) At 13, I killed a rat with a rusty 3 1/2" boy scout knife.
7) I save movie ticket stubs as if they are journal entries. I can list my company with almost every stub for the past 10 years.
1)In the third grade, walking home from school one day, my neighbor who was 7 years my senior grabbed and empty, insignificant coin holder from me in jest. I chased him for 30 feet, promptly gave up, and buried my face in the grass. I discovered the next day that the grass was in fact poison ivy as my left eye had swollen shut.
2) I have a mole on my lower right eye lid, but it's not a real mole. It's a sulfuric acid burn from a reaction that should have cost me that eye. I figure maybe there's a God afterall.
3) I have never dated a blonde girl.
4) I had never heard of pornography until the 7th grade when a kid brought a tape to class, put it in the VCR, and hit play.
5) I remember inconsequential details about people months and even years after they tell me.
HOW did you know about that!? translation: Are you stalking me?
Um, you told me.
Oh. I did? translation: That can't be right, I'd never tell someone like you anything about myself?
Yeah, you told me three Wednesday's ago while reading a fashion magazine. translation: Back off my grill crazy lady.
6) At 13, I killed a rat with a rusty 3 1/2" boy scout knife.
7) I save movie ticket stubs as if they are journal entries. I can list my company with almost every stub for the past 10 years.
posted by Saule Cogneur at 2:03 PM
3 Comments:
Ooh, I do #5, too. And yeah, you have to be careful because people will assume that you're obsessed with them or something. So I pretend to forget a lot . . .
I do #7. Not 10 years' worth though. I get annoyed when other people pay for me and don't give me my stub (usually claim to need to use the bathroom and thus need my ticket to get back in).
I have selective memory. I can remember the slightest bit of detail in certain situations. I don't know why this doesn't transfer over to school lectures though.
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